I Stand

The riverfront is empty. I stroll up as the sun starts to peak over the opposite bank.

Wind moves across the dark water and whips me in the face. The concrete crunches beneath my feet as I walk.

I say the same prayer out here morning after morning, again and again.

I say it now.

No answer. Only silence. No proof. No applause.

I squat down and peer through the dawn light.

What fills the silence?

Is it ~ “Nobody listens to me.”

Is it ~ “I’m so tired…”

Is it ~ “I just can’t catch a break.”

I open my hands. I breathe, and I say ~

“God ~ the universe, infinite intelligence ~ is not ignoring my prayers, he is testing my faith.”

I linger on the river’s edge as the sunlight breaks over the water and creeps up its banks.

I stop asking the silence to reassure me. I stop treating delay like denial.

The world wants to tell us who we are.

They tell us to be realistic.

They point at nothing and say, “See! You have failed.”

I hear them… and I decide that they have no power over me. I am the only person who commands my Self. I have complete authority over me.

I do not give the world a second thought.

I give my mind one clear instruction ~

I pull my shoulders back. I loosen my jaw. I feel both feet planted on the earth.

When I walk back home, I’ll keep my word. For now, I just relax into perfect alignment with myself.

A wave strikes the pilings.

My jacket snaps in the wind.

The fresh sunlight bathes me in warmth.

I do not move.

I say ~

“I am calm. I am still. I do not shake, I stand.”

Nothing I asked for has arrived yet… still I believe.

I have unshakeable faith.

Unshakeable faith.